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15 best jokes from Alec Baldwin roast by Tracy Morgan, Ireland Baldwin

Patrick Ryan
USA TODAY
Alec Baldwin speaks onstage during 'One Night Only: Alec Baldwin.'

NEW YORK — Some of Alec Baldwin's toughest critics are his own relatives.

Family members and former co-stars gathered for a searing, silly tribute to Saturday Night Live's chief President Trump impersonator, which airs on Spike TV Sunday (9 ET/PT) as One Night Only: Alec Baldwin. The boozy black-tie event was taped June 25 at Harlem's Apollo Theater, where his wife, Hilaria Baldwin, and daughter, Ireland Baldwin (of "rude, thoughtless little pig" infamy), earned some of the biggest laughs for their playful jabs. His 30 Rock castmates Tracy Morgan, Jane Krakowski and Jack McBrayer were also on hand to deliver jokes and a song, in the absence of the beloved sitcom's creator, Tina Fey.

Here are some of the funniest zingers of the night (some of which may be edited from the special):

1. "The last time I was on the show, I paid tribute to Don Rickles, a legendary stand-up whose career spanned six decades. Before that, it was Eddie Murphy, a comedian superstar and one of my heroes whose movies grossed more than $4 billion at the box office. And tonight I pay tribute to Alec Baldwin, host of Match Game."  — Tracy Morgan

2. “Alec taught me so much. During our time together, he told me about show business, life and how to tell your relatives to (screw) off when they wanted money.”  — Morgan

3. “He gave me great advice whenever I needed it. I’ll never forget one night he told me, ‘Drive home late after the show, Tracy, it’s safer. Less Walmart trucks on the road.’" — Morgan

4. “Alec and I are really like brothers. He and I have so much in common: I used to drink, he used to drink. I used to smoke weed, he used to do drugs. I had a car accident that almost ended my career, he had his MSNBC talk show.” — Morgan

5. "I’m here to roast this big old ham I call my father. Speaking of pigs ..." — Ireland Baldwin

6. "The truth is, that (rift) nearly killed him emotionally. I wouldn’t see my dad that upset ever again until I showed him my first tattoo. OK, my second tattoo. I couldn’t show him where I got the first one." — Baldwin

Ireland Baldwin roasts her dad.

7. “He gets inside the roles he plays and hangs on. In 1992, in Glengarry Glen Ross, he played a smug (jerk) and he’s never broken character.” — Robert De Niro

8. "Since the presidential campaign, Alec Baldwin’s career has gone through the roof, finding fame playing a sad, bitter, volatile, crazy man. He also does a great Trump impression." — De Niro

9. "Remember The Hunt for Red October? What a different time, the 90s were. Russia was our enemy, Alec Baldwin was a movie star."   — De Niro

10. “There are advantages to being married to a man Alec’s age. For one thing, he’s a wonderful grandfather to our children.” — Hilaria Baldwin

11. “I heard people say I’m married to a guy twice my age; that I’m in love with a senior citizen, an old man. And to all those people I say: I can’t argue with the facts.”  — Baldwin

12. “The world knows my husband as this intense guy who used to go on tirades — he’s getting older. He still goes on tirades, but now he has to stop and pee in the middle.”  — Baldwin

Jack McBrayer, left, Robert De Niro, Julianne Moore, Jane Krakowski and Tracy Morgan.

13. “Alec Baldwin deserves a night like this. I mean, Alec was a huge movie star. And I know that because he was constantly screaming it at the crew on 30 Rock.”  — Jack McBrayer

14. “A lot of people think Alec has a short temper, but I would never say that, because he would immediately beat the (crap) out of me.”  — McBrayer

15. "This is pretty much an open secret in Hollywood: If you work with him, you are guaranteed to win an Oscar. Alec played my husband in Still Alice, for which I won the Academy Award for best actress. Cate Blanchett was married to him in Blue Jasmine and she won the Academy Award for best actress. Kim Basinger was married to him in real life and she won best supporting actress. In 1988, Geena Davis played his wife in Beetlejuice, and later that same year  — that’s right  — she wins an Oscar for another movie. That’s how strong his mojo is. I wouldn’t be surprised at all if this year, Melania Trump walks away with best supporting. It’s like a superpower, his ability to deliver the Oscar. It works for everybody, except for him."  — Julianne Moore

Bill Clinton fetes Alec Baldwin with Donald Trump-referencing tribute